But when he started locking and hiding it, I became very suspicious. I found out by looking at his phone logs, in hindsight I knew something was wrong but never this! My husband went to Las Vegas the weekend of November 9th November 12th. Found out a few days ago he has had my Facebook info to spy on me. Until 2 years ago I thought that I could trust him emphatically. You might wonder why anyone would want to stay married to someone like that. He admits he had the chance to walk away back then but he didnt. He moved her in paying for her house.just next door to us! And my prayer is that you follow yourself, for you already have the answers. So I do the sneaky thing and text her his phone and from my phone, this chick is married she started to be nice then got nasty, i didnt believe half of what she is saying, Now all of the sudden she doesnt even know his name , a straight out LIE, its obvious, she claims she didnt even know he was married, and only talked to him about her problems with her husband. If you're in a romantic relationship with a narcissist. I do not know what your story is or how I could even help you. or read Is He Cheating? So the kids hear us fight they are well aware of what is going on. Amen. 4. He replies in the messages, I wish I was there! I want to scream because for years he told me it was all in my head, that I was just being ensecure. Dont mess with a bad husband cause at the end people will put all the fault on the woman. If you meet a man who is too charming and too good to be true, thats a BIG red flag!!! I found out he had been texting and seeing a 24 year old girl. Interesting note about the truth being encased in a misleading word structure apparently I never f***ing learn to leave his s*** alone, and that if I look Ill find it. I guess when he stops providing Ill probably lose interest in staying with him. i totally lost it then. Write down the answers. Then 4 months after that had an internet affair with another lady that is the mom of a girl in my 6 year old classroom at school she was totally obsessed with him to the point she went after me pretending she wanted to be with me, she offered him a three-some and sent him pictures of her with other ladies that her own husband took, I of course did not wanted anything with her and avoided her but her Obsession went so far that he finally told me everything about her that she was obsessed with him and not me. not even after 1 month i saw him at shoping centre with a women in his car i approached him , u know what he went to park his car from distance not for woman to see what is going on. ReadEmotional Affairs Vs. Innocent Friendshipsto learn the difference between the two types of cheating. That is, if you and he have never (or rarely) fought about anything, then you dont know how to deal with something as big and scary as cheating. I feel as though the world is a dark horrible place. when I asked just in case for what he just shrugged and said you and me and went back to what he was doing. In July 2015, he didnt come home at his regular time. I dont understand why my husband is the way he is. He has also lost some interest in sex and I have noticed he doesnt miss me or want to see me when I havent seen him in a couple days which is totally different then usualAre we just going through a stage or are my concerns legitimate?? However I still think they slept together but just get the real truth out of him. the really take note of how exactly many profiles he had out there. He is deceiving her even if he never actually has sex with her, he is making her believe that hes interested. But one day cleaning, I realized these items that were none of my business had never turned up as gifts to me. My sisters didnt even believe. Prepare for His Reaction. Could he have Aspergers Syndrome? Almost three years later, he has cheated on me more than once,put his hands on me, and called said things i never thought hed ever say. But how do i tell him? I was afraid to make wrong move just so he doesnt get angry or upset at me. His addiction and i dont know how to help him. Do something loving for yourself and move on. But saying that Monogamy is unnatural for all humans cant be factual. It will not get better. We were on and off until I thought he understood that I didnt want that in my life. But would i know i was sleeping the whole time this happened and who knows what happened or for how long he was gone for. Please advice me. @ Eya, I hear youyou make some good points.. and yes, it is my feeling that he has cheated on me, even if only emotionally but just to clarify some maybes you mentioned: It was certainly not his dream job thats for sure. I do all the 5 signs of cheating listed above. AMEN. But at the same time, how can I be overreacting? Nobody shold deal with anxiety issues alone. I will keep you in my prayers! I am 44 years old we have been together for 26 years. Please help. I happened to find out recently that someone I know knows her and her history and said that my husband really wasnt doing anything wrong and also that there is no way this woman is interested in him. Ive smacked him on his head but that hasnt helped yet. But I still have flashback days when I crawl into the bathtub and cry, and I continue to monitor what shes up to on Facebook, though I know its self-destructive. You will find another man, someone who wants only you. If you give her mixed signals and no answers then you have left her playing a guessing game how authentic you are, women are used to lip service and can get it anywhere, we want to know your intentions and your love and for it to not waiver so we can feel safe and secure to completely open up all our doors. He knows I know. There is no magic formula or tip that will help you get over your fiances cheating. Its pathetic and sad. Am I over reacting? He gets very defensive about her and didnt remove her until I did for him. 11 Core Values in a Relationship and Why They Are Important, When to Let Go of a Long-Distance Relationship and How, 8 Signs Youre Not Sexually Compatible and How to Handle It, How to Overcome Fearful-Avoidant Attachment Style, Lack of Communication in a Relationship: Causes, Effects, and Tips, What Makes a Man Want to Protect You? He looked me in the eye and told me I shouldnt believe anything she had told me and that she was crazy and loved to mess his relationships up. He never told me he was going to be in the car with her. And it hurts to be slapped in the face with this realism. I confronted him with this and he got angry and defensive and claims I am paranoid and suspicious. Thanks for pointing these things out. Doesn't matter what its about (finding out his sexuality) he cheated on you with a man he sourced from the internet. I mean he has telling me stories that they went out with marines, or did that or third, but nothing about meeting or becoming friends with a female. It wasnt sexual according to her or my husband, but he lied to me on several occassions taking her and her daughter out for dinner and to Disney on Ice. Well i confronted him with this affair after finding a msg he sent her about a romantic place and how he wishes she was with him. I knew our marriage wasnt perfect, but I never would have believed this kind, gentle man would do this sort of thing. I also think hes still eyeing other candidates and other woman but hasnt stepped over the line. I have felt like my husband has been cheating for year. This again supports the idea that monogomy is unnaturalwe are supposed to want other people. Rewriting history? He didnt call me back so I called the number only to find out it was a 24 year old girl only 2 years older than our 22 year old daughter. Why are you asking me? At that point she will give you the reasons for her suspicions. I caught him several times throughout the marriage and every time he begged me back and said it wouldnt ever happen again. Why would he need a picture of this girl, if the already has million pictures of herlself everybody to see? We have two boys together one is 2yrs and the other is 7 months old we have been married 10 yrs together 12. When I first confronted him he said she was a lesbian, but i found a text message he failed to delete that said I LOVE YOU. So im going to try and sum up my problem. Well he falls asleep and I went through his phone and found somethings from a female he said was like a sister. I needed to check something online and he gave me permission to use his PC. One emotional affair with a family friend whos like a sister and one very questionable message. I Dont really know what to do. Thank you for being here, and for sharing what youre going through with your husband. I dont understand. Why torture yourself when you already know that he wants her and is no doubt screwing her every opportunity that he gets. The number #1 factor that causes men to behave this way is actually relatively easy to change with a few subtle things you can say to him. Then why wouldnt you want to make sure she not only hears it from you but feels it through your actions? What should I do? i would never cheat on you i love you and only you. I have been getting anonimous emails about my husband seeing another woman since last year. I was having a miscarriage at that time and I wasnt aware of it. The bad news is that I cant respond personally to everyones comments, because I just dont have the time. I just need some insight to this situation because I make a harsh decision. My name hannan iam filipina live in saudi arabia middle east I been maried 3 years, my husband saudian, I was in loved with him because he was a sweet, loving but he always lying on me, not only once,twice million times thats whyI changed. Is it unfortunate? My husband was texting a female at work all night, I asked who the woman was and he said it was an older woman from another line (he works in a large assembly plant). I dont know why I tried for years and years and hoped that someday it would get better. I was ready to leave, but he drove me and my phone was dead. 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